The Dog's Bolloxed

Girl came home from watching the opening night performance of Bolloxed, and promptly told Ribsy what she thought of the play. Here's his best interpretation, from his very astute DPOV (dog point of view).

- Human bollocks are significantly larger than dog bollocks
- To the best of his knowledge, scrotal support devices (in white, pink or otherwise) are not available in dog sizes
- Irish accents are hard to understand, and he wonders if he would  "come" or "stay" if an Irish person said it, especially if this said Irish person was really excited thinking about football whilst calling him
- Pay attention to your body, including your heart. It can help you run fast to catch the ball. Or the girl.
- Being in love can hurt. Getting socked in the balls by an even harder ball can hurt more.
- Downplay your American-ness. You will only be ridiculed. (Good advice, as Ribsy is half-American himself.)
- There are many ways to refer to your bollocks. Girl happens to affectionally call his "blueberries". But there's only way to fall in love these days. Through technology.
- Go ahead and ask the Internet anything. Just don't ask it to play doctor, matchmaker, or the role of a good friend.
- Laughter is contagious!
- Don't download Kylie Minogue to your iPod if you know what's good for you.
- Humans like to mount just like dogs do.
- And all in all, this play was like a good walk at the dog park. Pleasant, enjoyable, with the occasional ball throwing, a few humorous breakdowns in communication, a humping or two, unwanted tugging, and plenty of swaying objects.
- And like all good walks, Ribsy says, "Let's do it again!"

For more info on upcoming performances of Bolloxed in Victoria, visit the Fringe Festival website.